1 00:00:02,378 --> 00:00:03,212 [Footsteps approaching ] 2 00:00:03,296 --> 00:00:04,589 Morty, you got to come on. 3 00:00:04,672 --> 00:00:06,132 You got to come with me. 4 00:00:06,215 --> 00:00:07,049 What's going on? 5 00:00:07,133 --> 00:00:08,050 I got a surprise for you, morty. 6 00:00:08,134 --> 00:00:08,926 It's the middle of the night. 7 00:00:09,010 --> 00:00:10,720 I got a surprise for you. 8 00:00:10,803 --> 00:00:11,721 Ow! 9 00:00:11,804 --> 00:00:13,598 Ow! You're tugging me too hard. 10 00:00:13,681 --> 00:00:14,961 I got a surprise for you, morty. 11 00:00:17,643 --> 00:00:19,187 What do you [burps] what do you 12 00:00:19,270 --> 00:00:21,189 think of this flying vehicle, morty? 13 00:00:21,272 --> 00:00:22,916 I built it out of stuff I found in the garage. 14 00:00:22,940 --> 00:00:24,317 Yeah, Rick, it's... it's great. 15 00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:25,484 Is this the surprise? 16 00:00:25,568 --> 00:00:27,653 Morty, I had to -— I had to do... 17 00:00:27,737 --> 00:00:29,322 I had to -— I had to -... 18 00:00:29,405 --> 00:00:30,323 I had to make a bomb, morty. 19 00:00:30,406 --> 00:00:31,324 I had to create a bomb. 20 00:00:31,407 --> 00:00:32,325 What?! A bomb?! 21 00:00:32,408 --> 00:00:33,688 We're gonna drop it down there... 22 00:00:33,743 --> 00:00:34,619 Just get a whole fresh start, morty. 23 00:00:34,702 --> 00:00:36,204 Create a whole fresh start. 24 00:00:36,287 --> 00:00:37,407 T-T-That's absolutely crazy! 25 00:00:37,455 --> 00:00:38,557 Come on, morty. Just take it easy, morty. 26 00:00:38,581 --> 00:00:40,041 It's gonna be good. 27 00:00:40,124 --> 00:00:42,102 Right now, we're gonna go pick up your little friend Jessica. 28 00:00:42,126 --> 00:00:43,127 Jessica? 29 00:00:43,211 --> 00:00:44,337 From my math class? 30 00:00:44,420 --> 00:00:46,214 When I drop the bomb, I don't... 31 00:00:46,297 --> 00:00:47,840 You know, I want you to have somebody, 32 00:00:47,924 --> 00:00:49,759 you know -— I want you to have the thing... 33 00:00:49,842 --> 00:00:51,153 I'm gonna make it like a new Adam and Eve, 34 00:00:51,177 --> 00:00:52,178 and you're gonna be Adam. 35 00:00:52,261 --> 00:00:53,304 [Groans] 36 00:00:53,387 --> 00:00:55,932 And Jessica's gonna be Eve, and so that's the surprise, morty. 37 00:00:56,015 --> 00:00:57,099 No, you can't! 38 00:00:57,183 --> 00:00:58,577 J-Jessica doesn't even know I exist. 39 00:00:58,601 --> 00:00:59,828 But —- but —- but forget about that, 40 00:00:59,852 --> 00:01:01,395 because you can't blow up humanity. 41 00:01:01,479 --> 00:01:02,998 I-I get what you're trying to say, m-morty. 42 00:01:03,022 --> 00:01:04,565 Listen, I'm not —- you don't... 43 00:01:04,649 --> 00:01:06,835 Y-Y—you don't got to worry about me trying to fool around with... 44 00:01:06,859 --> 00:01:08,921 With Jessica or mess around with Jessica or anything. 45 00:01:08,945 --> 00:01:10,339 I'm... I'm not that kind of guy, morty. 46 00:01:10,363 --> 00:01:11,656 What are you talking about, Rick? 47 00:01:11,739 --> 00:01:13,300 You -— you... you don't have to worry about me getting 48 00:01:13,324 --> 00:01:14,533 with Jessica or anything. 49 00:01:14,617 --> 00:01:17,036 She -— she... she... she —- she's all for you, morty. 50 00:01:17,119 --> 00:01:19,205 I don't care about Jessica! 51 00:01:19,288 --> 00:01:20,474 You know what, morty? You're right. 52 00:01:20,498 --> 00:01:22,083 Let's forget the girl all together. 53 00:01:22,166 --> 00:01:23,727 She -— she's probably nothing but trouble, anyways. 54 00:01:23,751 --> 00:01:25,169 Sh I p: Arming neutrino bomb. 55 00:01:25,253 --> 00:01:26,087 That's it... that's it, Rick. 56 00:01:26,170 --> 00:01:26,963 I'm taking the wheel. 57 00:01:27,046 --> 00:01:28,214 Get off of me, morty! 58 00:01:28,297 --> 00:01:29,733 I'm taking charge of this situation, buddy. 59 00:01:29,757 --> 00:01:30,967 What's gotten into you? 60 00:01:31,050 --> 00:01:32,385 I'm... i'm... i'm... 61 00:01:32,468 --> 00:01:34,762 I'm not gonna stand around like some sort of dumb... 62 00:01:34,845 --> 00:01:36,097 What are you, crazy? 63 00:01:36,180 --> 00:01:37,616 Person and just let you blow up the whole world. 64 00:01:37,640 --> 00:01:38,474 All right, all right. 65 00:01:38,557 --> 00:01:39,892 I'll... I'll land. 66 00:01:39,976 --> 00:01:40,810 I'll land. I'll land. 67 00:01:40,893 --> 00:01:41,686 I'll land the thing. 68 00:01:41,769 --> 00:01:42,687 I'll land the thing. 69 00:01:42,770 --> 00:01:44,188 Big tough guy all of a sudden. 70 00:01:47,942 --> 00:01:49,169 We'll park it right here, morty. 71 00:01:49,193 --> 00:01:50,504 Right here on the s-side of the r-road here. 72 00:01:50,528 --> 00:01:51,404 Oh, thank god. 73 00:01:51,487 --> 00:01:52,363 You know what? 74 00:01:52,446 --> 00:01:54,156 That was all a test, morty. 75 00:01:54,240 --> 00:01:57,201 Just an elaborate test to make you more assertive. 76 00:01:57,285 --> 00:01:58,160 It was? 77 00:01:58,244 --> 00:01:59,244 Sure. Why not? 78 00:01:59,287 --> 00:02:00,288 I don't... I don't know. 79 00:02:00,371 --> 00:02:01,247 You -— you know what, mo-... 80 00:02:01,330 --> 00:02:02,415 [Snonng] 81 00:02:02,498 --> 00:02:03,791 Sh I p: Neutrino bomb armed. 82 00:02:03,874 --> 00:02:04,874 [ Beeping ] 83 00:02:04,917 --> 00:02:06,043 Um... 84 00:02:06,127 --> 00:02:07,878 [ Beeping increases] 85 00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:44,123 I see there's a new episode of that singing show tonight. 86 00:02:44,206 --> 00:02:47,001 Who do you guys think is gonna be the best singer? 87 00:02:47,084 --> 00:02:48,270 Oh, my god. His head is in his food. 88 00:02:48,294 --> 00:02:49,211 I'm going to puke. 89 00:02:49,295 --> 00:02:50,713 Morty, are you getting sick? 90 00:02:50,796 --> 00:02:52,941 I told you not to practice-kiss the living-room pillow. 91 00:02:52,965 --> 00:02:54,091 The dog sleeps on it. 92 00:02:54,175 --> 00:02:55,843 I wasn't kissing a pillow, mom. 93 00:02:55,926 --> 00:02:58,346 I just —- I didn't get a lot of sleep last night. 94 00:02:58,429 --> 00:03:00,473 Maybe my dreams were just too loud or something. 95 00:03:00,556 --> 00:03:02,743 Or maybe you were out all night again with grandpa Rick. 96 00:03:02,767 --> 00:03:03,601 What?! 97 00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:04,477 Dad? 98 00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:06,413 What, so everyone's supposed to sleep every single night now? 99 00:03:06,437 --> 00:03:08,606 You realize that nighttime makes up half of all time? 100 00:03:08,689 --> 00:03:09,523 Damn it! 101 00:03:09,607 --> 00:03:10,775 - Jerry! - Beth! 102 00:03:10,858 --> 00:03:11,960 Oh, my god. My parents are so loud. 103 00:03:11,984 --> 00:03:12,984 I want to die. 104 00:03:13,027 --> 00:03:14,362 Mm, there is no god, summer. 105 00:03:14,445 --> 00:03:16,298 You got to rip that band—aid off now. You'll thank me later. 106 00:03:16,322 --> 00:03:18,074 Okay, with all due respect, Rick... 107 00:03:18,157 --> 00:03:19,992 What am I talking about? What respect is due? 108 00:03:20,076 --> 00:03:23,662 How is my son supposed to pass his classes if you keep dragging 109 00:03:23,746 --> 00:03:26,374 him off for high—concept Sci-Fi rigamarole? 110 00:03:26,457 --> 00:03:28,810 Listen, Jerry, m don't want to overstep my bounds or anything. 111 00:03:28,834 --> 00:03:30,378 It's your house. It's your world. 112 00:03:30,461 --> 00:03:31,563 You're a real Julius Caesar. 113 00:03:31,587 --> 00:03:32,731 But I'll tell you some... Tell you how... 114 00:03:32,755 --> 00:03:33,982 How I feel about school, Jerry. 115 00:03:34,006 --> 00:03:35,257 It's a waste of time -... 116 00:03:35,341 --> 00:03:36,675 A bunch of people running around, 117 00:03:36,759 --> 00:03:37,802 bumping into each other. 118 00:03:37,885 --> 00:03:39,553 G-Guy up front says, "two plus two." 119 00:03:39,637 --> 00:03:41,389 The people in the back say, "four." 120 00:03:41,472 --> 00:03:43,617 Then the bell rings, and they give you a carton of milk 121 00:03:43,641 --> 00:03:46,769 and a piece of paper that says you can go take a dump or something. 122 00:03:46,852 --> 00:03:49,271 I mean, it's... it's not a place for smart people, Jerry. 123 00:03:49,355 --> 00:03:50,540 And I know that's not a popular opinion, 124 00:03:50,564 --> 00:03:53,692 but it's my two cents on the issue. 125 00:03:53,776 --> 00:03:55,403 This was a good breakfast, Beth. 126 00:03:55,486 --> 00:03:57,530 You really made the crap out of those eggs. 127 00:03:57,613 --> 00:03:59,824 I wish your mother was here to eat them. 128 00:03:59,907 --> 00:04:01,200 Oh, dad. 129 00:04:01,283 --> 00:04:02,076 What? 130 00:04:02,159 --> 00:04:04,036 For real? 131 00:04:04,120 --> 00:04:05,847 Teacher: All right, now, everybody get settled. 132 00:04:05,871 --> 00:04:07,540 Get away from the windows! 133 00:04:07,623 --> 00:04:08,791 Now, look, we're gonna be 134 00:04:08,874 --> 00:04:10,751 dealing with some real serious stuff today. 135 00:04:10,835 --> 00:04:12,711 You might have heard of it. It's called math. 136 00:04:12,795 --> 00:04:14,839 And without it, none of us would even exist, 137 00:04:14,922 --> 00:04:17,049 so let's jump right in —- two plus two. 138 00:04:17,133 --> 00:04:18,134 Jessica. 139 00:04:18,217 --> 00:04:19,593 Five plus five. 140 00:04:19,677 --> 00:04:20,886 Tenssica. 141 00:04:20,970 --> 00:04:21,887 Okay, good. 142 00:04:21,971 --> 00:04:23,055 It's time for the quiz. 143 00:04:23,139 --> 00:04:24,140 [All groan] 144 00:04:24,223 --> 00:04:25,492 Yeah, you know what?! Aw, too bad! 145 00:04:25,516 --> 00:04:26,559 Tough! 146 00:04:26,642 --> 00:04:28,811 First row, take one. Pass it back for me. 147 00:04:28,894 --> 00:04:30,688 The stakes are high in this room. 148 00:04:30,771 --> 00:04:34,024 There's crucial things happening here every day. 149 00:04:34,108 --> 00:04:34,984 People getting smarter. 150 00:04:35,067 --> 00:04:36,169 Some of y'all getting dumber. 151 00:04:36,193 --> 00:04:38,446 Some of y'all ain't gonna see 3:00. 152 00:04:40,239 --> 00:04:41,949 Jessica: Hi, morty. 153 00:04:42,032 --> 00:04:43,032 Whoa! 154 00:04:43,075 --> 00:04:44,160 Hi, Jessica. 155 00:04:44,243 --> 00:04:45,578 Can I show these to you? 156 00:04:45,661 --> 00:04:46,537 Wow. 157 00:04:46,620 --> 00:04:47,705 Th-they're both great. 158 00:04:47,788 --> 00:04:48,706 Thank you. 159 00:04:48,789 --> 00:04:49,808 You know what I named these? 160 00:04:49,832 --> 00:04:51,041 My little morties. 161 00:04:51,125 --> 00:04:53,919 Uh, that's flattering and a little weird. 162 00:04:54,003 --> 00:04:55,963 Do you know what I want you to do with them? 163 00:04:56,046 --> 00:04:57,046 Rename them? 164 00:04:57,089 --> 00:04:58,466 Squeeze them. 165 00:04:58,549 --> 00:04:59,633 Manhandle them. 166 00:04:59,717 --> 00:05:00,759 Give them the business. 167 00:05:00,843 --> 00:05:02,219 See if you can shuffle them. 168 00:05:02,303 --> 00:05:04,513 I mean, really get in there and knock them around. 169 00:05:04,597 --> 00:05:05,764 No wrong answers. 170 00:05:05,848 --> 00:05:06,640 Wow. 171 00:05:06,724 --> 00:05:08,017 Well, okay, Jessica. 172 00:05:08,100 --> 00:05:09,477 L-Let's give this a shot. 173 00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:10,728 Mm. 174 00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:11,812 Oh, morty. 175 00:05:11,896 --> 00:05:13,355 What are you doing to me? 176 00:05:13,439 --> 00:05:15,608 Uh, i-I'm just doing my best. 177 00:05:15,691 --> 00:05:16,691 Morty! 178 00:05:16,734 --> 00:05:17,568 What are you doing to me?! 179 00:05:17,651 --> 00:05:18,486 Jessica. 180 00:05:18,569 --> 00:05:19,612 Morty! 181 00:05:19,695 --> 00:05:21,697 [Mumbling] Jessica. 182 00:05:21,780 --> 00:05:23,741 Five more minutes of this, and I'm gonna get mad. 183 00:05:23,824 --> 00:05:25,701 Je-Jessica. 184 00:05:25,784 --> 00:05:26,994 [Mumbling] Jessica. 185 00:05:27,077 --> 00:05:28,305 Not my fault this is happening. 186 00:05:28,329 --> 00:05:30,581 [School bell rings] 187 00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:32,374 Well, well, well. 188 00:05:32,458 --> 00:05:33,375 Uh, morning, frank. 189 00:05:33,459 --> 00:05:34,502 "Morning"? 190 00:05:34,585 --> 00:05:35,503 What was... what is that supposed to mean? 191 00:05:35,586 --> 00:05:36,712 You making fun of me? 192 00:05:36,795 --> 00:05:37,981 Are you trying to say my family's poor? 193 00:05:38,005 --> 00:05:39,048 Oh, geez, frank. 194 00:05:39,131 --> 00:05:40,525 I don't know if a knife is necessary. 195 00:05:40,549 --> 00:05:42,944 I mean, you know, y-you kind of had things handled without it. 196 00:05:42,968 --> 00:05:45,221 You telling me how to bully now? 197 00:05:45,304 --> 00:05:46,680 Big mistake, morty. 198 00:05:46,764 --> 00:05:51,018 And now I'm gonna cut you, 'cause my family's rich. 199 00:05:51,101 --> 00:05:52,561 [Gasdsi 200 00:05:52,645 --> 00:05:53,979 there you are, morty. 201 00:05:54,063 --> 00:05:55,231 Listen to me. 202 00:05:55,314 --> 00:05:57,000 I got an errand to run in a whole different dimension. 203 00:05:57,024 --> 00:05:58,526 I need an extra pair of hands. 204 00:05:58,609 --> 00:05:59,735 Oh, geez, Rick. 205 00:05:59,818 --> 00:06:01,153 W-What'd you do to frank? 206 00:06:01,237 --> 00:06:02,672 It's pretty obvious, morty. I froze him. 207 00:06:02,696 --> 00:06:04,532 Now listen... I need your help, morty. 208 00:06:04,615 --> 00:06:06,158 I mean, we got —- we got to get... 209 00:06:06,242 --> 00:06:08,261 Get the hell out of here and go take care of business. 210 00:06:08,285 --> 00:06:09,787 [ Burps] 211 00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:11,330 It's important. Come on, morty. 212 00:06:11,413 --> 00:06:12,413 I don't know, Rick. 213 00:06:12,456 --> 00:06:13,666 I-I can't leave school again. 214 00:06:13,749 --> 00:06:15,185 Do you have any concept of how much higher the stakes 215 00:06:15,209 --> 00:06:16,418 get out there, morty? 216 00:06:16,502 --> 00:06:17,979 What do you think -— I can just do it all by myself? 217 00:06:18,003 --> 00:06:18,879 Come on! 218 00:06:18,963 --> 00:06:20,005 Aw, geez. Okay. 219 00:06:20,089 --> 00:06:21,382 I guess I can skip history. 220 00:06:21,465 --> 00:06:22,925 What about frank? 221 00:06:23,008 --> 00:06:24,152 I mean, shouldn't you unfreeze him? 222 00:06:24,176 --> 00:06:25,386 I'll do it later, morty. 223 00:06:25,469 --> 00:06:26,469 He'll be fine. 224 00:06:26,512 --> 00:06:29,306 Let's go. 225 00:06:29,390 --> 00:06:31,308 [Thinking] Oh, my god. 226 00:06:31,392 --> 00:06:33,852 I'm about to walk past frank palicky. 227 00:06:33,936 --> 00:06:37,022 This is the story we'll be telling our children. 228 00:06:37,106 --> 00:06:38,315 Hi, frank. 229 00:06:38,399 --> 00:06:40,109 [ Cracks, shatters ] 230 00:06:40,192 --> 00:06:42,611 Aah! 231 00:06:42,695 --> 00:06:44,113 [Horse whinnying] 232 00:06:44,196 --> 00:06:46,031 Scalpel. 233 00:06:46,115 --> 00:06:47,199 Scalpel. 234 00:06:47,283 --> 00:06:48,409 [Door opens] Knock, knock. 235 00:06:48,492 --> 00:06:49,577 J erry? 236 00:06:49,660 --> 00:06:51,700 My manager gave me an hour for lunch, and I thought, 237 00:06:51,745 --> 00:06:54,039 "hey, why not swing by where your wife works?" 238 00:06:54,123 --> 00:06:55,749 [Flatline] We're losing him. 239 00:06:55,833 --> 00:06:57,126 [Beeps] Okay, he's back. 240 00:06:57,209 --> 00:06:59,646 Jerry, please tell me you're here for an incredibly urgent reason. 241 00:06:59,670 --> 00:07:01,130 Well, it's lunch. 242 00:07:01,213 --> 00:07:04,008 I mean, it's one of three meals that have existed for millennia. 243 00:07:04,091 --> 00:07:05,134 [Flatline] Losing him. 244 00:07:05,217 --> 00:07:06,385 [Beeps] Stabilized. 245 00:07:06,468 --> 00:07:08,929 Okay, I only ask, Jerry, because, as you know, 246 00:07:09,013 --> 00:07:11,473 my job involves performing heart surgery. 247 00:07:11,557 --> 00:07:12,891 Well, yeah, on horses. 248 00:07:12,975 --> 00:07:14,018 Excuse me? 249 00:07:14,101 --> 00:07:15,811 Okay. Let's not rehash thaffight. 250 00:07:15,894 --> 00:07:18,647 I sense that you're busy and will now be on my way. 251 00:07:18,731 --> 00:07:19,815 Whoa! 252 00:07:19,898 --> 00:07:21,400 What is this on the floor? 253 00:07:21,483 --> 00:07:24,945 Some kind of literature for a really nice-looking nursing home. 254 00:07:25,029 --> 00:07:26,697 Hey, honey, crazy idea -— Bad pitch... 255 00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:28,157 Let's put your dad here. 256 00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:29,676 Let's put your dad in a nursing home. 257 00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:30,618 [Flatline] 258 00:07:30,701 --> 00:07:31,619 We're losing him. 259 00:07:31,702 --> 00:07:32,620 Hey, Tom. 260 00:07:32,703 --> 00:07:33,722 We know when we're losing him. 261 00:07:33,746 --> 00:07:35,039 We can hear the beeps! 262 00:07:36,332 --> 00:07:37,249 There she is. All right. 263 00:07:37,333 --> 00:07:38,542 Come on, morty. Let's go. 264 00:07:38,626 --> 00:07:39,501 Oh, geez. 265 00:07:39,585 --> 00:07:40,836 Okay. 266 00:07:42,171 --> 00:07:43,631 Oh, man, Rick. 267 00:07:43,714 --> 00:07:45,007 What is this place? 268 00:07:45,090 --> 00:07:47,718 It's dimension 35c, and it's got the perfect 269 00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:50,763 climate conditions for a special type of tree, morty, 270 00:07:50,846 --> 00:07:52,139 called a mega tree, 271 00:07:52,222 --> 00:07:53,515 and there's fruit in those trees, 272 00:07:53,599 --> 00:07:55,059 and there's seeds in those fruits. 273 00:07:55,142 --> 00:07:56,518 I'm talking about mega seeds. 274 00:07:56,602 --> 00:07:58,812 They're —- [burping] They're incredibly powerful, 275 00:07:58,896 --> 00:08:00,981 and I need them to help me with my research, morty. 276 00:08:01,065 --> 00:08:02,983 Oh, man, Rick. I'm looking around this place, 277 00:08:03,067 --> 00:08:04,878 and I'm starting to work up some anxiety about this whole thing. 278 00:08:04,902 --> 00:08:05,962 All right. All right. Calm down. 279 00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:07,112 Listen to me, morty. 280 00:08:07,196 --> 00:08:09,406 I know that new situations can be intimidating. 281 00:08:09,490 --> 00:08:11,843 You're looking around, and it's all scary and different, but, 282 00:08:11,867 --> 00:08:14,662 you know, m-meeting them head on, charging right into them 283 00:08:14,745 --> 00:08:16,914 like a bull... That's how we grow as people. 284 00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:18,749 I'm no stranger to scary situations. 285 00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:20,209 I deal with them all the time. 286 00:08:20,292 --> 00:08:22,492 Now, if you just stick with me, morty, we're gonna be... 287 00:08:22,544 --> 00:08:23,962 Holy crap, morty, run! 288 00:08:24,046 --> 00:08:25,089 [Screaming ] 289 00:08:25,172 --> 00:08:27,091 I never seen that thing before in my life. 290 00:08:27,174 --> 00:08:28,652 I don't even know what the hell it is! 291 00:08:28,676 --> 00:08:29,956 We got to get out of here, morty! 292 00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:30,886 It's gonna kill us! 293 00:08:30,969 --> 00:08:31,970 We're gonna die! 294 00:08:32,054 --> 00:08:33,222 We're gonna die, morty! 295 00:08:35,516 --> 00:08:37,142 Oh, morty, take a deep breath. 296 00:08:37,226 --> 00:08:39,228 Breathe that —- breathe that fresh air in, morty. 297 00:08:39,311 --> 00:08:40,521 Y—you smell that? 298 00:08:40,604 --> 00:08:42,147 That's the smell of adventure, morty. 299 00:08:42,231 --> 00:08:44,626 That's... that's the smell of... Of... of... of a whole different 300 00:08:44,650 --> 00:08:46,652 evolutionary timeline. 301 00:08:46,735 --> 00:08:47,820 All right, Rick, look... 302 00:08:47,903 --> 00:08:49,238 How much longer is this gonna be? 303 00:08:49,321 --> 00:08:50,590 Shouldn't I be back at school by now? 304 00:08:50,614 --> 00:08:51,740 Are you joking me? 305 00:08:51,824 --> 00:08:54,243 I mean, look at all the crazy crap surrounding us. 306 00:08:54,326 --> 00:08:55,512 Look at that thing right there. 307 00:08:55,536 --> 00:08:56,912 W-What the hell is that thing? 308 00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:58,640 You think you're gonna see that kind of thing at school? 309 00:08:58,664 --> 00:09:00,249 Look at it just lumbering around. 310 00:09:00,332 --> 00:09:02,918 It defies all logic -— That thing. 311 00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:04,002 Yeah, Rick, I get it. 312 00:09:04,086 --> 00:09:05,504 We're surrounded by monsters. 313 00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:07,387 That's kind of the reason why I want to leave. 314 00:09:07,464 --> 00:09:08,298 Ta-ta-ta—ta-ta-ta. 315 00:09:08,382 --> 00:09:11,510 Morty, you see this? 316 00:09:11,593 --> 00:09:13,554 You see what we just stumbled upon, morty? 317 00:09:13,637 --> 00:09:14,823 Any idea what that is down there? 318 00:09:14,847 --> 00:09:15,931 The mega trees? 319 00:09:16,014 --> 00:09:17,367 That's right, morty... The mega trees 320 00:09:17,391 --> 00:09:18,726 with the mega fruit on them. 321 00:09:18,809 --> 00:09:20,245 And that's what I'm talking about, morty. 322 00:09:20,269 --> 00:09:21,645 That's where my seeds are. 323 00:09:21,729 --> 00:09:22,831 If we would have done what you wanted, 324 00:09:22,855 --> 00:09:24,165 I would have never have found them, 325 00:09:24,189 --> 00:09:25,917 because y... because you're so in love with school. 326 00:09:25,941 --> 00:09:27,192 All right, all right. 327 00:09:27,276 --> 00:09:29,170 So, what's so special about these seeds, anyways? 328 00:09:29,194 --> 00:09:30,863 You ask a lot of questions, morty. 329 00:09:30,946 --> 00:09:32,197 Not very charismatic. 330 00:09:32,281 --> 00:09:33,717 It makes you kind of an [burps] under—- 331 00:09:33,741 --> 00:09:35,159 [burps] Underfoot figure. 332 00:09:35,242 --> 00:09:36,410 Just take these shoes, morty. 333 00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:38,293 They're sp... [burps] Special grappling shoes. 334 00:09:38,328 --> 00:09:40,581 When you're wearing these things -— ba... these babies, 335 00:09:40,664 --> 00:09:43,292 you can basically just walk on any surface you want, morty —- 336 00:09:43,375 --> 00:09:45,294 up, down, below, turn around to the left. 337 00:09:45,377 --> 00:09:47,212 These things really bring it all together. 338 00:09:47,296 --> 00:09:48,922 Aah! 339 00:09:49,006 --> 00:09:50,233 You have to turn them on, morty! 340 00:09:50,257 --> 00:09:51,133 [Thuds] 341 00:09:51,216 --> 00:09:52,468 The shoes have to be turned on! 342 00:09:52,551 --> 00:09:55,304 Beth: I am not putting my father in a home! 343 00:09:55,387 --> 00:09:57,264 He just came back into my life, 344 00:09:57,347 --> 00:10:00,768 and you want to grab him and stuff him under a mattress like 345 00:10:00,851 --> 00:10:02,311 last month's Victoria's secret? 346 00:10:02,394 --> 00:10:04,874 I told you... I was ordering you something for Valentine's day. 347 00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:09,610 More importantly, your father is a horrible influence on our son. 348 00:10:09,693 --> 00:10:10,944 Everything cool in here, Beth? 349 00:10:11,028 --> 00:10:11,862 It's fine, Davin. 350 00:10:11,945 --> 00:10:12,988 Okay, cool. 351 00:10:13,071 --> 00:10:14,549 You know, we did something great today. 352 00:10:14,573 --> 00:10:18,076 There's nothing more noble and free than the heart of a horse. 353 00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:20,579 Since we're fighting, if you ever have an affair 354 00:10:20,662 --> 00:10:22,223 with that guy, I will come to the hotel room 355 00:10:22,247 --> 00:10:24,708 and blow my brains out all over your naked bodies. 356 00:10:24,792 --> 00:10:27,753 Look, I appreciate the stress you're under, but 357 00:10:27,836 --> 00:10:30,130 morty was having trouble in school way before my dad moved 358 00:10:30,214 --> 00:10:33,509 in, and the only influence I can see Rick having is that, 359 00:10:33,592 --> 00:10:36,720 for the first time in his life, morty has a friend. 360 00:10:36,804 --> 00:10:37,930 [Telephone ringing] 361 00:10:38,013 --> 00:10:39,223 [Sighs] 362 00:10:39,306 --> 00:10:40,766 Well, maybe you're right. 363 00:10:40,849 --> 00:10:42,851 Uh, yeah, maybe I am. 364 00:10:42,935 --> 00:10:43,852 I'm my father's daughter. 365 00:10:43,936 --> 00:10:44,937 I'm smart. 366 00:10:45,020 --> 00:10:45,896 Why do you think I'm a heart surgeon? 367 00:10:45,979 --> 00:10:46,814 Horse heart surgeon. 368 00:10:46,897 --> 00:10:48,232 - Hello? - Mrs. Smith? 369 00:10:48,315 --> 00:10:49,875 This is principal vagina... No relation. 370 00:10:49,942 --> 00:10:51,753 I wonder if you and morty's father might be able to have 371 00:10:51,777 --> 00:10:52,921 a chat with me this afternoon? 372 00:10:52,945 --> 00:10:55,614 [Suspenseful music plays] 373 00:10:55,697 --> 00:10:58,116 Morty, oh, you really d-did a number on your legs right now. 374 00:10:58,200 --> 00:10:59,368 [Groaning] 375 00:10:59,451 --> 00:11:00,720 You know, you got to turn the shoes on, morty, 376 00:11:00,744 --> 00:11:01,912 for them to work. 377 00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:03,181 Yeah, look... I turned mine on. 378 00:11:03,205 --> 00:11:04,516 I had no problem getting down here. 379 00:11:04,540 --> 00:11:06,041 It was a leisurely breeze. 380 00:11:06,124 --> 00:11:07,376 I'm in a lot of pain, Rick. 381 00:11:07,459 --> 00:11:08,877 Yeah, I can see that. 382 00:11:08,961 --> 00:11:11,797 But do you think you'll still be able to help me [burps] collect 383 00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:13,090 my seeds, morty? 384 00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:14,091 Are you kidding me?! 385 00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:15,092 That's it, Rick! 386 00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:16,426 That's the last straw! 387 00:11:16,510 --> 00:11:18,446 I can't believe this... I'm sitting here with both 388 00:11:18,470 --> 00:11:20,198 of my legs broken, and you're still asking me 389 00:11:20,222 --> 00:11:21,765 about getting those seeds?! 390 00:11:21,849 --> 00:11:23,308 Ooh! Ow! Oh! 391 00:11:23,392 --> 00:11:24,685 Y—y-you're a monster. 392 00:11:24,768 --> 00:11:26,436 Y—you're like Hitler, but -... 393 00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:28,564 But even Hitler cared about Germany or something. 394 00:11:28,647 --> 00:11:30,274 Okay, hold on just a second, morty. 395 00:11:30,357 --> 00:11:33,694 [Groaning] 396 00:11:33,777 --> 00:11:37,656 [Panting] 397 00:11:37,739 --> 00:11:41,743 Ooh. 398 00:11:41,827 --> 00:11:45,372 Ohh. 399 00:11:49,793 --> 00:11:51,461 Ooh. 400 00:11:52,504 --> 00:11:53,714 Wow, Rick. 401 00:11:53,797 --> 00:11:56,258 That stuffjust healed my broken legs instantly. 402 00:11:56,341 --> 00:11:59,553 I mean, I've never felt so good in my life. 403 00:11:59,636 --> 00:12:00,554 Thank you. 404 00:12:00,637 --> 00:12:01,889 Don't worry about it, morty. 405 00:12:01,972 --> 00:12:03,908 Just come help me get these seeds, all right, buddy? 406 00:12:03,932 --> 00:12:05,100 Sure thing, Rick. 407 00:12:05,183 --> 00:12:06,744 Not that you asked, morty, but what just happened 408 00:12:06,768 --> 00:12:09,646 there is I went into a future dimension with such advanced 409 00:12:09,730 --> 00:12:11,940 medicine that they had broken—leg serum at every 410 00:12:12,024 --> 00:12:13,317 corner drugstore. 411 00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:14,627 The stuff was all over the place, morty. 412 00:12:14,651 --> 00:12:16,153 Wow, that's pretty crazy, Rick. 413 00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:17,571 There's just one problem, morty... 414 00:12:17,654 --> 00:12:18,780 One little hang-up. 415 00:12:18,864 --> 00:12:20,449 The dimension I visited was so advanced, 416 00:12:20,532 --> 00:12:22,659 they had also halted the aging process, 417 00:12:22,743 --> 00:12:24,161 and everyone there was young, morty, 418 00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:25,370 and they had been forever. 419 00:12:25,454 --> 00:12:27,039 I was the only old person there, morty. 420 00:12:27,122 --> 00:12:29,309 It was [burps] like I was some sort of, you know, celebrity, 421 00:12:29,333 --> 00:12:30,500 walking around. 422 00:12:30,584 --> 00:12:31,960 H was fascinating to them. 423 00:12:32,044 --> 00:12:34,355 There were a lot of attractive women there, morty, and they -... 424 00:12:34,379 --> 00:12:36,024 They... they —- they all wanted time with me. 425 00:12:36,048 --> 00:12:37,848 I had a lot of fun with a lot of young ladies, 426 00:12:37,883 --> 00:12:39,468 but I spent so much time there, 427 00:12:39,551 --> 00:12:40,951 my interdimensional portal device —- 428 00:12:41,011 --> 00:12:42,638 it's got no charge left, morty. 429 00:12:42,721 --> 00:12:43,721 It's got no charge left. 430 00:12:43,764 --> 00:12:44,598 What?! 431 00:12:44,681 --> 00:12:45,825 It's as good as garbage, morty. 432 00:12:45,849 --> 00:12:46,868 It's not gonna work anymore, morty. 433 00:12:46,892 --> 00:12:48,036 Oh, geez, Rick, that's not good. 434 00:12:48,060 --> 00:12:49,686 W-What are we gonna do? 435 00:12:49,770 --> 00:12:51,855 I-I have to be back at school right now. 436 00:12:51,939 --> 00:12:53,179 How are we gonna get back home? 437 00:12:53,231 --> 00:12:54,775 There's ways to get back home, morty. 438 00:12:54,858 --> 00:12:56,794 It's just —- it's just gonna be a little bit of a hassle. 439 00:12:56,818 --> 00:12:58,630 We're gonna have to go through interdimensional customs, 440 00:12:58,654 --> 00:13:01,073 so you're gonna have to do me a real solid. 441 00:13:01,156 --> 00:13:02,074 Uh-oh. 442 00:13:02,157 --> 00:13:03,408 When we get to customs, 443 00:13:03,492 --> 00:13:05,553 I'm gonna need you to take these seeds into the bathroom, 444 00:13:05,577 --> 00:13:07,096 and I'm gonna need you to put them way up 445 00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:08,038 inside your butthole, morty. 446 00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:09,331 In my butt? 447 00:13:09,414 --> 00:13:11,100 Put them way up inside there, as far as they can fit. 448 00:13:11,124 --> 00:13:12,250 Oh, geez, Rick. 449 00:13:12,334 --> 00:13:13,603 I really don't want to have to do that. 450 00:13:13,627 --> 00:13:15,087 Well, somebody's got to do it, morty. 451 00:13:15,170 --> 00:13:18,090 Th-these seeds aren't gonna get through customs unless they're 452 00:13:18,173 --> 00:13:19,192 in someone's rectum, morty. 453 00:13:19,216 --> 00:13:20,217 [Whimpers] 454 00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:21,444 And they'll fall right out of mine. 455 00:13:21,468 --> 00:13:23,053 I've done this too many times, morty. 456 00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:24,262 I mean, you're young. 457 00:13:24,346 --> 00:13:26,181 You've got your whole life ahead of you, 458 00:13:26,264 --> 00:13:28,433 and your anal cavity is still taut, yet malleable. 459 00:13:28,517 --> 00:13:29,911 You got to do it for grandpa, morty. 460 00:13:29,935 --> 00:13:31,746 Y—you've got to put these seeds inside your butt. 461 00:13:31,770 --> 00:13:32,562 In my butt? 462 00:13:32,646 --> 00:13:33,480 Come on, morty. 463 00:13:33,563 --> 00:13:34,398 Please, morty. 464 00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:35,524 You have to do it, morty. 465 00:13:35,607 --> 00:13:36,525 Oh, man. 466 00:13:36,608 --> 00:13:37,901 [School bell rings] 467 00:13:37,985 --> 00:13:40,380 Principal: The fact is, your son, morty, has attended this school for a 468 00:13:40,404 --> 00:13:42,781 total of seven hours over the last two months. 469 00:13:42,864 --> 00:13:44,408 What? Why didn't you notify us? 470 00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:46,284 I done been notifying you. 471 00:13:46,368 --> 00:13:47,720 Have you not been getting the messages 472 00:13:47,744 --> 00:13:49,138 I've been leaving with morty's grandfather? 473 00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:50,247 Boom! 474 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:51,873 Told you! In your face! 475 00:13:51,957 --> 00:13:53,750 He is ruining our child! 476 00:13:53,834 --> 00:13:55,252 Wait, what am I celebrating? 477 00:13:55,335 --> 00:13:57,021 Yeah, see, I thought something was fishy there, 478 00:13:57,045 --> 00:13:58,481 because it's usually morty's grandpa that's taking 479 00:13:58,505 --> 00:13:59,297 him out of school. 480 00:13:59,381 --> 00:14:00,298 Summer? 481 00:14:00,382 --> 00:14:03,719 [Sobbing ] What kind of god lets this happen? 482 00:14:03,802 --> 00:14:04,886 We had a little incident. 483 00:14:04,970 --> 00:14:06,596 A student was frozen to death. 484 00:14:06,680 --> 00:14:09,725 And there's no evidence that a latino student did it! 485 00:14:09,808 --> 00:14:11,452 Everyone wants to take this to a racial place. 486 00:14:11,476 --> 00:14:12,894 I won't let them. 487 00:14:12,978 --> 00:14:16,940 The g/arp zone is for f/arping and ung/arping only. 488 00:14:17,024 --> 00:14:19,943 Alien: So, I told him, "give me the blimfarx," you know? 489 00:14:20,027 --> 00:14:21,528 This... this guy —- 490 00:14:21,611 --> 00:14:22,964 he doesn't understand interstellar currency. 491 00:14:22,988 --> 00:14:24,698 It's, like, I'm trying to eat a flimflam —- 492 00:14:24,781 --> 00:14:26,867 like, that's what we eat on girvonesk. 493 00:14:26,950 --> 00:14:29,745 The g/arp zone is for f/arping and ung/arping only. 494 00:14:29,828 --> 00:14:31,038 I don't like it here, morty. 495 00:14:31,121 --> 00:14:32,372 I can't abide bureaucracy. 496 00:14:32,456 --> 00:14:34,225 I don't like being told where to go and what to do. 497 00:14:34,249 --> 00:14:35,584 I consider it a violation. 498 00:14:35,667 --> 00:14:37,228 Did you get those seeds all the way up your butt? 499 00:14:37,252 --> 00:14:38,295 Yeah, Rick. 500 00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:39,731 Let's just get this over with, okay? 501 00:14:39,755 --> 00:14:41,399 I mean, these things are pointy. They hurt. 502 00:14:41,423 --> 00:14:42,591 That means they're good ones. 503 00:14:42,674 --> 00:14:44,051 You're a good kid, morty. 504 00:14:44,134 --> 00:14:46,344 Those mega seeds are super valuable to my work. 505 00:14:46,428 --> 00:14:48,096 You've been a huge help to me. 506 00:14:48,180 --> 00:14:50,616 I'm gonna be able to do [burps] all kinds of things with them. 507 00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:52,476 It's gonna be great, morty. 508 00:14:52,559 --> 00:14:53,745 [ Burps] All kinds of science. 509 00:14:53,769 --> 00:14:55,062 Okay, next through. 510 00:14:55,145 --> 00:14:56,938 Except you. You go over there. 511 00:14:57,022 --> 00:14:58,124 Why does he have to go over there? 512 00:14:58,148 --> 00:14:59,191 Random check. 513 00:14:59,274 --> 00:15:00,334 He's got to go through the new machine. 514 00:15:00,358 --> 00:15:01,419 What new -— [burps] What new machine? 515 00:15:01,443 --> 00:15:02,486 It's a new machine. 516 00:15:02,569 --> 00:15:03,921 It detects stuff all the way up your butt. 517 00:15:03,945 --> 00:15:05,614 Run, morty! Run! 518 00:15:05,697 --> 00:15:06,782 Aah! 519 00:15:06,865 --> 00:15:07,783 Red alert! 520 00:15:07,866 --> 00:15:10,285 [Alarms blaring] 521 00:15:11,703 --> 00:15:13,705 [Grunts] 522 00:15:14,956 --> 00:15:16,374 [Screeching ] 523 00:15:20,295 --> 00:15:22,047 Ohhhhh! 524 00:15:24,883 --> 00:15:26,051 [Coughs] 525 00:15:26,134 --> 00:15:26,968 [Crying I 526 00:15:27,052 --> 00:15:30,180 [coughing ] 527 00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:31,807 Hey! Ohhhhhh. 528 00:15:31,890 --> 00:15:32,766 [Groans] 529 00:15:32,849 --> 00:15:33,683 Aah! 530 00:15:33,767 --> 00:15:34,810 Don't think about it! 531 00:15:36,812 --> 00:15:38,480 Ooh! 532 00:15:40,190 --> 00:15:41,191 [Shoes beeping ] 533 00:15:41,274 --> 00:15:42,192 Oh, nice, morty! 534 00:15:42,275 --> 00:15:43,555 The student becomes the teacher. 535 00:15:43,610 --> 00:15:46,238 [ Buzzing ] 536 00:15:46,321 --> 00:15:50,992 [ Both screaming ] 537 00:15:51,076 --> 00:15:52,119 [ Both grunt] 538 00:15:52,202 --> 00:15:53,453 Whoooooo! 539 00:15:53,537 --> 00:15:55,997 Aah! 540 00:15:56,081 --> 00:15:57,666 Aw, hell, no, dawg. 541 00:15:57,749 --> 00:15:59,018 You know me... I'm just trying to... 542 00:15:59,042 --> 00:16:01,211 Aah! 543 00:16:04,089 --> 00:16:06,192 I need to type in the coordinates to our home world, morty. 544 00:16:06,216 --> 00:16:07,676 - Cover me. - Oh, man. 545 00:16:07,759 --> 00:16:09,679 I mean, you know, i-i don't want to shoot nobody. 546 00:16:09,761 --> 00:16:10,846 They're just robots, morty! 547 00:16:10,929 --> 00:16:12,013 It's okay to shoot them! 548 00:16:12,097 --> 00:16:13,098 They're robots! 549 00:16:13,181 --> 00:16:15,142 Aah! 550 00:16:15,225 --> 00:16:16,560 My leg is shot off! 551 00:16:16,643 --> 00:16:17,978 Glenn's bleeding to death! 552 00:16:18,061 --> 00:16:20,147 Someone call his wife and children! 553 00:16:20,230 --> 00:16:21,273 They're not robots, Rick! 554 00:16:21,356 --> 00:16:22,607 It's a figure of speech, morty. 555 00:16:22,691 --> 00:16:23,691 They're bureaucrats. 556 00:16:23,733 --> 00:16:24,733 I don't respect them. 557 00:16:24,776 --> 00:16:25,944 Just keep shooting, morty. 558 00:16:26,027 --> 00:16:28,613 You have no idea what prison is like here! 559 00:16:31,533 --> 00:16:33,034 Holy crap! This is insane! 560 00:16:33,118 --> 00:16:35,328 [ Crowd screaming ] 561 00:16:43,378 --> 00:16:44,378 Rick: Come on, morty! 562 00:16:44,421 --> 00:16:45,781 We got to get the hell out of here! 563 00:16:47,591 --> 00:16:49,176 [All gasp] 564 00:16:49,259 --> 00:16:51,261 Wow. 565 00:16:51,344 --> 00:16:53,680 Did you just come into the cafeteria through a portal? 566 00:16:53,763 --> 00:16:55,056 Uh, yeah. 567 00:16:55,140 --> 00:16:57,851 Well, you know, my... my Ferrari's in the shop. 568 00:16:57,934 --> 00:16:59,311 [Chuckles nervously] 569 00:16:59,394 --> 00:17:00,270 Ju... just kidding. 570 00:17:00,353 --> 00:17:01,938 - You're morty, right? - Yeah. 571 00:17:02,022 --> 00:17:03,166 You can get his number later. 572 00:17:03,190 --> 00:17:04,900 Come on, morty. We got to get out of here. 573 00:17:04,983 --> 00:17:06,252 You got to get those seeds out of your ass. 574 00:17:06,276 --> 00:17:07,319 Oh, look, honey. 575 00:17:07,402 --> 00:17:09,613 It's our son with Albert ein-douche. 576 00:17:09,696 --> 00:17:10,780 What? 577 00:17:10,864 --> 00:17:12,341 I'm an angry father, not an improvisor. 578 00:17:12,365 --> 00:17:13,575 Oh, hi, Jerry. 579 00:17:13,658 --> 00:17:15,243 Oh, my goodness, morty! 580 00:17:15,327 --> 00:17:16,912 What are you doing out of class? 581 00:17:16,995 --> 00:17:18,205 We talked about this. 582 00:17:18,288 --> 00:17:20,141 Your —- your parents and I are very disappointed in —- 583 00:17:20,165 --> 00:17:22,751 in this behavior. 584 00:17:22,834 --> 00:17:24,628 No? No takers? 585 00:17:24,711 --> 00:17:26,796 You guys should really not be touching that stuff. 586 00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:27,899 It's beyond your reasoning. 587 00:17:27,923 --> 00:17:28,840 You're beyond our reasoning! 588 00:17:28,924 --> 00:17:30,217 Takes one to know one. 589 00:17:30,300 --> 00:17:34,721 Dad, how could you make my son miss an entire semester of school? 590 00:17:34,804 --> 00:17:36,282 I mean, it's not like he's a hot girl. 591 00:17:36,306 --> 00:17:38,266 He can't just bail on his life and set up shop 592 00:17:38,350 --> 00:17:39,517 in someone else's. 593 00:17:39,601 --> 00:17:40,828 What —- what are you guys doing with my stuff? 594 00:17:40,852 --> 00:17:43,521 We're moving you... To a nursing home. 595 00:17:43,605 --> 00:17:44,522 A nursing home? 596 00:17:44,606 --> 00:17:45,708 What are... what are you, nuts? 597 00:17:45,732 --> 00:17:46,732 I'm a genius. 598 00:17:46,775 --> 00:17:48,109 I build robots for fun. 599 00:17:48,193 --> 00:17:50,254 Well, now you can build baskets and watch Paul Newman movies 600 00:17:50,278 --> 00:17:53,573 on vhs and mentally scar the boy scouts every Christmas. 601 00:17:53,657 --> 00:17:54,491 What does that mean? 602 00:17:54,574 --> 00:17:55,408 It's personal. 603 00:17:55,492 --> 00:17:56,743 Dad, mom, c-come on. 604 00:17:56,826 --> 00:17:59,079 Rick just needed my help is all. 605 00:17:59,162 --> 00:18:00,455 Morty, stay out of this. 606 00:18:00,538 --> 00:18:04,167 You are obviously not capable ofjudging these situations on your own. 607 00:18:04,251 --> 00:18:05,478 What are you trying to say about morty? 608 00:18:05,502 --> 00:18:06,562 That he's stupid or something? 609 00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:07,879 Oh, don't high-road us, dad. 610 00:18:07,963 --> 00:18:10,966 You know fully well that morty is the last child that needs to 611 00:18:11,049 --> 00:18:12,259 be missing classes. 612 00:18:12,342 --> 00:18:14,177 I-I-I don't know what you mean by that. 613 00:18:14,261 --> 00:18:15,863 Can... can -— can you be a little bit more specific? 614 00:18:15,887 --> 00:18:17,097 Oh, for crying out —- 615 00:18:17,180 --> 00:18:18,908 he's got some kind of disability or something. 616 00:18:18,932 --> 00:18:20,267 Is that what you want us to say? 617 00:18:20,350 --> 00:18:21,768 I do? 618 00:18:21,851 --> 00:18:23,520 Well, duh doy, son. 619 00:18:23,603 --> 00:18:27,232 Look, I love you, morty, but we both know you're not as fast as 620 00:18:27,315 --> 00:18:29,418 the other kids, and if you want to compete in this world, 621 00:18:29,442 --> 00:18:31,278 you got to work twice as hard. 622 00:18:31,361 --> 00:18:32,696 Aw, geez, dad. 623 00:18:32,779 --> 00:18:35,573 Y—you know, that's a lot to drop on a kid all at once. 624 00:18:35,657 --> 00:18:38,159 Morty, t-tell your parents the square root of pi. 625 00:18:38,243 --> 00:18:39,577 Oh, come on, Rick. 626 00:18:39,661 --> 00:18:40,661 You know I can't. 627 00:18:40,704 --> 00:18:41,806 The square root of pi, morty... go. 628 00:18:41,830 --> 00:18:44,874 1.77245385. 629 00:18:44,958 --> 00:18:46,293 Whoa! 630 00:18:46,376 --> 00:18:47,669 What the hell? 631 00:18:47,752 --> 00:18:49,296 Holy crap. He's right. 632 00:18:49,379 --> 00:18:51,299 Morty, tell your parents the first law of [burps] 633 00:18:51,381 --> 00:18:52,674 Thermodynamics. 634 00:18:52,757 --> 00:18:55,844 "The increment in the internal energy of a system is equal to 635 00:18:55,927 --> 00:18:57,655 the increment of heat supplied to the system." 636 00:18:57,679 --> 00:18:59,431 Wow! I'm so smart! 637 00:18:59,514 --> 00:19:00,765 But —- 638 00:19:00,849 --> 00:19:01,725 I told the both of you... 639 00:19:01,808 --> 00:19:02,684 School is stupid. 640 00:19:02,767 --> 00:19:03,977 It's not how you learn things. 641 00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:05,186 Morty's a gifted child. 642 00:19:05,270 --> 00:19:06,646 He has a special mind. 643 00:19:06,730 --> 00:19:07,957 That's why he's my little helper. 644 00:19:07,981 --> 00:19:09,441 He's like me. 645 00:19:09,524 --> 00:19:12,193 He's gonna be doing great science stuff later in his life. 646 00:19:12,277 --> 00:19:13,611 He's too smart for school. 647 00:19:13,695 --> 00:19:16,823 H-He needs to keep hanging out [Burps] and helping me. 648 00:19:16,906 --> 00:19:19,743 Jerry, I don't want whatever's happening here to stop. 649 00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:21,286 No, I-I understand. 650 00:19:21,369 --> 00:19:23,330 Uh, maybe we overreacted. 651 00:19:23,413 --> 00:19:26,082 But he has to keep going to school. 652 00:19:26,166 --> 00:19:27,459 Okay, Jerry. 653 00:19:27,542 --> 00:19:28,877 You drive a hard bargain, 654 00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:30,354 but [burps] what am I supposed to do? 655 00:19:30,378 --> 00:19:31,796 Say —- [burps] Say no? 656 00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:33,882 You -— you really wear the pants around here. 657 00:19:33,965 --> 00:19:35,818 I just want you to know, between us, from now on, 658 00:19:35,842 --> 00:19:38,136 it's gonna be 100% honesty and open, 659 00:19:38,219 --> 00:19:39,471 clear communication. 660 00:19:39,554 --> 00:19:41,848 Frank palicky was frozen to death today! 661 00:19:41,931 --> 00:19:42,950 No idea what you're talking about. 662 00:19:42,974 --> 00:19:43,892 [Sobbing ] 663 00:19:43,975 --> 00:19:45,226 Okay. 664 00:19:45,310 --> 00:19:47,771 Well, uh, morty, it's your bedtime in an hour. 665 00:19:47,854 --> 00:19:49,397 Don't stay up all night again. 666 00:19:49,481 --> 00:19:50,774 This is good, though. 667 00:19:50,857 --> 00:19:52,150 This can work. 668 00:19:52,233 --> 00:19:54,235 I think we can be a family. 669 00:19:54,319 --> 00:19:56,696 And now, Beth, if you'll have me, 670 00:19:56,780 --> 00:19:58,656 I would love to have you. 671 00:19:58,740 --> 00:19:59,824 You know what? 672 00:19:59,908 --> 00:20:01,159 Okay. 673 00:20:01,242 --> 00:20:02,952 Holy cow, Rick. 674 00:20:03,036 --> 00:20:05,413 I didn't know hanging out with you was making me smarter. 675 00:20:05,497 --> 00:20:07,415 Full disclosure, morty... It's not. 676 00:20:07,499 --> 00:20:10,460 Temporary superintelligence is just a side effect of the 677 00:20:10,543 --> 00:20:12,263 mega seeds dissolving in your rectal cavity. 678 00:20:12,337 --> 00:20:13,546 Aw, man. 679 00:20:13,630 --> 00:20:16,007 Yeah, and once those seeds [burps] wear off, 680 00:20:16,091 --> 00:20:17,811 you're gonna lose most of your motor skills, 681 00:20:17,884 --> 00:20:20,762 and you're also gonna lose a significant amount of 682 00:20:20,845 --> 00:20:22,239 brain functionality for 72 hours, morty. 683 00:20:22,263 --> 00:20:24,849 Starting [burps] right about now. 684 00:20:24,933 --> 00:20:25,933 Ohh, man. 685 00:20:25,975 --> 00:20:28,186 [Groaning] Oh, geez! Ohh. 686 00:20:28,269 --> 00:20:30,230 I'm sorry, morty. It's a bummer. 687 00:20:30,313 --> 00:20:32,023 In reality, you're as dumb as they come. 688 00:20:32,107 --> 00:20:33,817 And I needed those seeds real bad, 689 00:20:33,900 --> 00:20:36,087 and I had to give them upjust to get your parents off my back, 690 00:20:36,111 --> 00:20:38,029 so now we're gonna have to go get more. 691 00:20:38,113 --> 00:20:39,882 And then we're gonna go on even more adventures after that, 692 00:20:39,906 --> 00:20:41,157 morty. 693 00:20:41,241 --> 00:20:43,094 And you're gonna keep your mouth shut about it, morty, 694 00:20:43,118 --> 00:20:45,054 because the world is full of idiots that don't understand 695 00:20:45,078 --> 00:20:46,162 what's important, 696 00:20:46,246 --> 00:20:47,539 and they'll tear us apart, morty. 697 00:20:47,622 --> 00:20:50,208 But if you stick with me, I'm gonna accomplish great things, 698 00:20:50,291 --> 00:20:52,353 morty, and you're gonna be part of them, and together, 699 00:20:52,377 --> 00:20:53,586 we're gonna run around, morty. 700 00:20:53,670 --> 00:20:55,314 We're gonna do all kinds of wonderful things, morty. 701 00:20:55,338 --> 00:20:56,256 Just you and me, morty. 702 00:20:56,339 --> 00:20:57,340 Oh, no, no. 703 00:20:57,424 --> 00:20:58,818 The outside world is our enemy, morty. 704 00:20:58,842 --> 00:21:01,302 We're the only [burps] friends we've got, morty. 705 00:21:01,386 --> 00:21:02,554 It's just Rick and morty -... 706 00:21:02,637 --> 00:21:04,806 [Burps] Rick and morty and their adventures, morty. 707 00:21:04,889 --> 00:21:06,599 Rick and morty forever and forever. 708 00:21:06,683 --> 00:21:08,476 100 years, Rick and morty's things. 709 00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:11,771 Me and Rick and morty running around, and Rick and morty time. 710 00:21:11,855 --> 00:21:14,190 All day long, forever. 711 00:21:14,274 --> 00:21:15,817 All -— a hundred days. 712 00:21:15,900 --> 00:21:17,735 Rick and morty forever... 100 times. 713 00:21:17,819 --> 00:21:20,738 Over and over, rickandmortyadventures.Com. 714 00:21:20,822 --> 00:21:23,741 www.rickandmorty.com. 715 00:21:23,825 --> 00:21:25,994 www.rickandmortyadventures. 716 00:21:26,077 --> 00:21:27,662 All 100 years. 717 00:21:27,745 --> 00:21:30,331 Every minute, rickandmorty.Com. 718 00:21:30,415 --> 00:21:34,127 www.100timesrickandmorty.com. 719 00:21:55,565 --> 00:21:57,484 It's a good-a show!