1 00:00:01,543 --> 00:00:03,629 Rick: Anyway, that's how I escaped from space prison! 2 00:00:03,754 --> 00:00:05,005 Oh! Scary place. 3 00:00:05,130 --> 00:00:07,925 Wow, Rick! That's... that's one... one heck of a story. 4 00:00:08,050 --> 00:00:10,111 I sure do wish I could've been there to see it happen. 5 00:00:10,135 --> 00:00:12,054 Oh, come on. Who wants to watch a mad scientist 6 00:00:12,179 --> 00:00:13,222 use handmade Sci-Fi tools 7 00:00:13,347 --> 00:00:15,015 to take out highly trained alien guards 8 00:00:15,140 --> 00:00:17,351 when we can sit here and be a family at shoney's? 9 00:00:17,476 --> 00:00:19,978 Dad, it's great to have you back, no matter where we are. 10 00:00:20,103 --> 00:00:21,383 But wouldn't you like to go home? 11 00:00:21,480 --> 00:00:23,607 Emotionally speaking, honey, shoney's is my home. 12 00:00:23,732 --> 00:00:25,234 Yeah, but you just got out of prison. 13 00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:27,653 I mean, how much of a step up from that is... 14 00:00:27,778 --> 00:00:29,506 Jerry, get out of the booth, take all your clothes off, 15 00:00:29,530 --> 00:00:31,990 - and fold yourself 12 times. - You got it. 16 00:00:37,371 --> 00:00:38,413 Six folds, huh? 17 00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:40,791 W-What, have you guys got me in a series 9000? 18 00:00:40,916 --> 00:00:42,793 You cheap insect fucks didn't think I was worth 19 00:00:42,918 --> 00:00:43,794 your best equipment? 20 00:00:43,919 --> 00:00:46,588 Man, I told the money bugs. 21 00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:48,632 I said, "you know who this guy is, right? 22 00:00:48,757 --> 00:00:50,801 You want me to get intel out of the smartest mammal 23 00:00:50,926 --> 00:00:53,512 in the galaxy, you'd better give me a decent brainalyzer." 24 00:00:53,637 --> 00:00:55,357 Well, you might as well order some pancakes, 25 00:00:55,389 --> 00:00:57,367 because I don't see the need to leave this part of my brain. 26 00:00:57,391 --> 00:00:58,850 Oh, I think you do. 27 00:00:58,976 --> 00:01:01,120 Eventually, you're either gonna relax your cerebellum... 28 00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:01,853 Shoney's. 29 00:01:01,979 --> 00:01:04,273 Or the series 9000 is going to turn it into mush. 30 00:01:04,398 --> 00:01:06,441 Relaxed enough? 31 00:01:06,567 --> 00:01:07,943 I admire you, Rick. 32 00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:10,612 When I... 33 00:01:10,737 --> 00:01:12,197 Rick, here's... 34 00:01:15,659 --> 00:01:17,244 - What's going on? - It's hard to tell. 35 00:01:17,369 --> 00:01:18,996 He may have manifested some sort of butt. 36 00:01:19,121 --> 00:01:19,997 He can do that? 37 00:01:20,122 --> 00:01:22,833 He is the smartest man in the universe. 38 00:01:59,703 --> 00:02:02,205 I tell you, the galactic federation taking over earth... 39 00:02:02,331 --> 00:02:04,207 Best thing that's ever happened to this family. 40 00:02:04,333 --> 00:02:05,917 I just got my sixth promotion this week, 41 00:02:06,043 --> 00:02:07,377 and I still don't know what I do. 42 00:02:07,502 --> 00:02:08,962 Who cares how high they promote you? 43 00:02:09,087 --> 00:02:10,714 Everyone just gets paid in pills. 44 00:02:10,839 --> 00:02:12,775 Well, when you're not sure what you do for a living, 45 00:02:12,799 --> 00:02:14,134 you can make your own rules. 46 00:02:14,259 --> 00:02:16,219 Summer, show your father some respect. 47 00:02:16,345 --> 00:02:18,639 He's pulling down a six-chewable-figure income. 48 00:02:18,764 --> 00:02:20,766 I'll get that in a moment. 49 00:02:20,891 --> 00:02:21,892 How are everyone's pills? 50 00:02:22,017 --> 00:02:23,810 Oh, morty, you've hardly touched your pills. 51 00:02:23,935 --> 00:02:25,812 I kind of had big pills for lunch, and I... 52 00:02:25,937 --> 00:02:27,731 Wasn't gonna eat any more pills. 53 00:02:28,690 --> 00:02:30,150 Thank you, Conroy. 54 00:02:30,275 --> 00:02:31,735 You spoil us, Conroy. 55 00:02:31,860 --> 00:02:33,445 Grandpa Rick wouldn't put up with this! 56 00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:36,073 Stop saying his name. He abandoned us. 57 00:02:36,198 --> 00:02:37,366 Willem dafoe! 58 00:02:37,491 --> 00:02:39,826 T-That's the guy I couldn't think of this morning. 59 00:02:39,951 --> 00:02:41,151 Don't make my mistake, summer. 60 00:02:41,244 --> 00:02:42,996 Don't deify the people that leave you. 61 00:02:43,121 --> 00:02:46,249 You'll end up a horse surgeon in a world controlled by aliens 62 00:02:46,375 --> 00:02:49,586 whose medicine keeps horses... Healthy forever. 63 00:02:50,629 --> 00:02:52,109 Horses live longer than tortoises now! 64 00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:53,316 Is that what you want for yourself? 65 00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:56,093 Maybe I just want you to care if I run away yelling! 66 00:02:56,218 --> 00:02:58,053 Who saved room for pill brulée? 67 00:02:58,178 --> 00:02:59,513 Ooh! 68 00:02:59,638 --> 00:03:01,848 I can see why you chose this family-friendly restaurant 69 00:03:01,973 --> 00:03:03,350 to represent your cerebellum. 70 00:03:03,475 --> 00:03:06,603 So safe, so comfortable, so shoney's. 71 00:03:06,728 --> 00:03:09,856 But admit it, Rick... you're going crazy cooped up in here. 72 00:03:09,981 --> 00:03:12,317 - Let's go visit some memories. - Oh, any particular ones? 73 00:03:12,442 --> 00:03:13,642 You want to see my first boner 74 00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:15,213 or should we go straight to the moment 75 00:03:15,237 --> 00:03:17,531 I discovered interdimensional travel? 76 00:03:17,656 --> 00:03:19,783 Ooh. Your little flappy doodles are twitching. 77 00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:21,719 Does that mean you're aroused, or did you just get a signal 78 00:03:21,743 --> 00:03:23,221 that one of your buddies found a grape? 79 00:03:23,245 --> 00:03:24,371 It's arousal. 80 00:03:24,496 --> 00:03:26,456 Yes, I'd like very much to visit the memory 81 00:03:26,581 --> 00:03:27,791 ofyouinvenfing yourponalgun. 82 00:03:27,916 --> 00:03:30,210 Yeah. Well, tough titties. 83 00:03:30,335 --> 00:03:33,213 There's no tougher titty than a psychotic break, Rick. 84 00:03:33,338 --> 00:03:37,259 Well, that depends on who breaks first... me or the titty. 85 00:03:39,261 --> 00:03:41,304 Someone special you remember? 86 00:03:41,430 --> 00:03:42,973 Is that your memory of her out there... 87 00:03:43,098 --> 00:03:44,391 Between where you were on 9/11 88 00:03:44,516 --> 00:03:45,892 and your favorite sports blooper? 89 00:03:48,270 --> 00:03:51,690 If we stay here, you'll die, along with all your memories. 90 00:03:51,815 --> 00:03:54,109 If you take me where I want to go, 91 00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:55,527 she'll be there, too, won't she? 92 00:03:55,652 --> 00:03:58,822 The day I invented the portal gun is the day I lost her. 93 00:03:58,947 --> 00:03:59,823 Oh, that sounds cool. 94 00:03:59,948 --> 00:04:02,117 I can get what I want and you can say goodbye. 95 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:04,953 Fine, but I'm driving. 96 00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:06,788 As an excuse to strip away our freedom. 97 00:04:08,790 --> 00:04:11,793 Huh? What are you... What are you doing? 98 00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:14,379 Grandpa Rick must have some secret lab, right? 99 00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:17,257 With, like, laser guns and jets packs and a space tank! 100 00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:18,862 And we can go break him out of prison! 101 00:04:18,925 --> 00:04:19,968 Look at these dead flies! 102 00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:21,612 Maybe if we arrange them in a certain order, 103 00:04:21,636 --> 00:04:23,364 it plays a hologram or it opens a secret door. 104 00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:25,098 Summer, you're freaking me out! 105 00:04:25,223 --> 00:04:27,326 I know things have changed a lot, and I know you miss Rick, 106 00:04:27,350 --> 00:04:29,352 but getting him back wouldn't make things better. 107 00:04:29,478 --> 00:04:30,979 And, you know, we're not doing so bad. 108 00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:32,355 We're miserable, morty! 109 00:04:32,481 --> 00:04:35,734 There's a mandatory curfew, their weird calendar made me 47, 110 00:04:35,859 --> 00:04:37,652 and they weaponized the Eiffel Tower! 111 00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:40,197 I like being 35. H can rent a car now. 112 00:04:40,322 --> 00:04:41,322 Because you suck! 113 00:04:41,406 --> 00:04:42,967 You've been keeping your lip zipped about it 114 00:04:42,991 --> 00:04:44,785 since grandpa got arrested, but the fact is, 115 00:04:44,910 --> 00:04:46,661 you're freaking stoked to bail on him. 116 00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:48,038 He bails on everybody! 117 00:04:48,163 --> 00:04:49,664 He bailed on mom when she was a kid! 118 00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:51,374 He... he bailed on tiny planet! 119 00:04:51,500 --> 00:04:53,269 And in case I never made this clear to you, summer, 120 00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:54,336 he bailed on you. 121 00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:56,254 He left you to rot in a world that he ruined 122 00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:57,379 because he doesn't care! 123 00:04:57,422 --> 00:04:59,925 Because nobody's special to him, summer, not even himself. 124 00:05:00,050 --> 00:05:02,761 So if you really want your grandpa back, grab a shovel. 125 00:05:02,886 --> 00:05:05,597 The one that won't let you down is buried in your backyard! 126 00:05:05,722 --> 00:05:06,722 You're right! 127 00:05:06,807 --> 00:05:08,183 What?! No! I'm not right! 128 00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:10,393 H was using ghoulish overkill! 129 00:05:10,519 --> 00:05:11,895 Ghoulish overkill, summer! 130 00:05:12,020 --> 00:05:13,355 Summer: 131 00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:17,526 Oh, god! Oh, god! 132 00:05:17,651 --> 00:05:18,651 Whoa, whoa! 133 00:05:21,655 --> 00:05:23,615 - Where are we going? - To the day it all began... 134 00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:24,616 And ended. 135 00:05:24,741 --> 00:05:26,576 The moment that changed everything. 136 00:05:28,370 --> 00:05:30,330 Man: Welcome to McDonald's. Can I take your order? 137 00:05:30,372 --> 00:05:31,972 Yeah, I'd like to get a 10-piece mcnugget 138 00:05:31,998 --> 00:05:33,875 and, uh, a bunch of the szechuan sauce. 139 00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:35,645 Like, as much as you're allowed to give me. 140 00:05:35,669 --> 00:05:38,547 In 1998, they had this promotion for the Disney film "mulan," 141 00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:39,756 where they... where they... 142 00:05:39,881 --> 00:05:41,591 They created a new sauce for the McNuggets 143 00:05:41,716 --> 00:05:44,094 called szechuan sauce, and it's delicious! 144 00:05:44,219 --> 00:05:46,059 And then they got rid of it, and now it's gone. 145 00:05:46,137 --> 00:05:48,199 The only place we're gonna be able to try it is in my memory. 146 00:05:48,223 --> 00:05:50,159 Rick, you're doing this bit while your brain is melting. 147 00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:51,560 Okay. All right, all right. 148 00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:55,521 Is that... 149 00:05:56,898 --> 00:05:58,358 I used to wear blue pants. 150 00:06:03,446 --> 00:06:05,824 When'd you make the leap to interdimensional travel? 151 00:06:05,949 --> 00:06:08,034 I didn't. I did. 152 00:06:08,159 --> 00:06:11,162 Well, well, well. If it isn't us. 153 00:06:11,288 --> 00:06:13,408 You know the worst part about inventing teleportation? 154 00:06:13,456 --> 00:06:15,101 Suddenly you're able to travel the whole galaxy, 155 00:06:15,125 --> 00:06:16,352 and the first thing you learn is 156 00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:18,253 you're the last guy to invent teleportation. 157 00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:20,338 Fortunately, you're about to invent something 158 00:06:20,463 --> 00:06:21,590 much more powerful. 159 00:06:22,966 --> 00:06:24,301 What? 160 00:06:30,932 --> 00:06:33,018 Summer, nobody has to know about that. 161 00:06:33,143 --> 00:06:35,288 We could put it right back and pretend we never saw it, 162 00:06:35,312 --> 00:06:36,706 like we did with dad's mannequin leg. 163 00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:39,149 Fine. Stay here. I'll rescue grandpa myself. 164 00:06:39,274 --> 00:06:41,002 - How are you gonna do that?! - I don't know yet. 165 00:06:41,026 --> 00:06:43,486 I'll make it up as I go. That's what grandpa Rick does. 166 00:06:43,612 --> 00:06:44,946 That's what heroes do. 167 00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:46,471 You want to see what a hero Rick is? 168 00:06:46,531 --> 00:06:48,617 I-I'll bring you somewhere, summer! 169 00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:51,119 - Um... - My goodness, children. 170 00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:53,890 Relinquish the illegal technology 171 00:06:53,914 --> 00:06:55,749 to the nearest federation representative. 172 00:06:55,874 --> 00:06:59,002 And then we'll all play balderdash. 173 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:15,477 Oh, my goodness! 174 00:07:15,602 --> 00:07:17,395 Oh! Oh! My goo... 175 00:07:20,315 --> 00:07:22,233 Oh, my god. 176 00:07:22,359 --> 00:07:24,611 I have that exact same top. 177 00:07:24,736 --> 00:07:26,112 What is this place? 178 00:07:26,237 --> 00:07:27,948 And what's with "hunger games" summer? 179 00:07:28,073 --> 00:07:31,868 That's my sister. This used to be my home. 180 00:07:31,993 --> 00:07:33,578 Imagine doing anything you want, 181 00:07:33,703 --> 00:07:35,747 then hopping to a timeline where you never did it. 182 00:07:35,872 --> 00:07:38,667 Imagine going anywhere, anytime, with nobody able to stop you. 183 00:07:38,792 --> 00:07:40,627 - Sounds lonely. - Lonely? 184 00:07:40,752 --> 00:07:43,338 Dude, you have yourself... Your infinite selves. 185 00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:44,463 It's a nonstop party 186 00:07:44,506 --> 00:07:46,508 where all the guests are the only person we like. 187 00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:48,319 You think it's cool being the smartest man on earth, 188 00:07:48,343 --> 00:07:49,779 but once we give you this technology, 189 00:07:49,803 --> 00:07:52,806 you become the smartest thing in every conceivable universe... 190 00:07:52,931 --> 00:07:55,225 The infinite Rick, a god. 191 00:07:55,350 --> 00:07:56,350 Enh, pass. 192 00:07:56,434 --> 00:07:59,312 Excuse me? Bro, ricks don't pass on this. 193 00:07:59,437 --> 00:08:00,647 Who do you think you are? 194 00:08:00,772 --> 00:08:02,816 A different kind of Rick, I guess. 195 00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:04,651 Well, we'll see how long that lasts. 196 00:08:07,278 --> 00:08:10,740 I heard Sci-Fi noises. Did you make a breakthrough? 197 00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:11,992 Sort of. 198 00:08:12,117 --> 00:08:13,576 I just took a long look at myself, 199 00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:16,579 and I don't think this science thing is gonna pay off. 200 00:08:16,705 --> 00:08:19,874 Well, why don't I get Beth and we'll go out for ice cream? 201 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:22,043 That, Diane, is the last great idea 202 00:08:22,168 --> 00:08:24,379 that will ever be had in this garage. 203 00:08:27,424 --> 00:08:30,135 Good roasted cronenberg, I assume. 204 00:08:30,719 --> 00:08:33,596 Mom, you're looking... feral. 205 00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:36,224 I can't believe Rick did this. 206 00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:37,827 These are the parts of Rick's adventures 207 00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:40,270 you don't get to see... The parts he leaves behind. 208 00:08:40,395 --> 00:08:41,855 All right. It's been great, guys. 209 00:08:41,980 --> 00:08:43,732 Um, I really only wanted to stop by here 210 00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:45,275 for a quick "I told you so." 211 00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:47,485 - So, uh... - Looking for this? 212 00:08:47,610 --> 00:08:49,988 - What are you doing with that?! - It stinks of Rick. 213 00:08:50,113 --> 00:08:52,073 No! Why?! 214 00:08:52,198 --> 00:08:53,074 Why would you do that?! 215 00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:55,076 W-What is the matter with you people?! 216 00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:57,245 You're a bunch of back savages... 217 00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:59,247 Backwood savage morons! 218 00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:02,667 You can never leave. She cannot remain. 219 00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:04,627 She stinks of Rick. 220 00:09:04,753 --> 00:09:06,296 - Aah! - Aah! 221 00:09:07,797 --> 00:09:10,341 Hold your fire! Hold your fire! I'm morty c-137. 222 00:09:11,885 --> 00:09:13,511 We detected a compromised portal gun. 223 00:09:13,636 --> 00:09:15,156 - Where is your Rick? - He's in prison. 224 00:09:15,180 --> 00:09:15,805 Summer. 225 00:09:15,930 --> 00:09:17,348 He got captured by the federation, 226 00:09:17,474 --> 00:09:18,767 and we were going to rescue him. 227 00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:19,892 Very troubling. 228 00:09:19,934 --> 00:09:21,186 We can't risk citadel secrets 229 00:09:21,311 --> 00:09:22,729 falling into the federation's hands. 230 00:09:22,854 --> 00:09:24,654 We'll dispatch s.E.A.L. Team ricks immediately 231 00:09:24,689 --> 00:09:26,649 to break into the prison holding c-137... 232 00:09:26,775 --> 00:09:27,609 Boo-yah. 233 00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:29,110 And assassinate him. 234 00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:31,279 Boo-nah? 235 00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:32,673 Come on, girls! 236 00:09:32,697 --> 00:09:34,783 The ice cream's gonna melt! 237 00:09:45,418 --> 00:09:49,005 No-o-o-o-o-o-o! 238 00:09:49,130 --> 00:09:51,925 Wow. This sauce is fucking amazing. 239 00:09:52,050 --> 00:09:53,384 You said it was promoting a movie? 240 00:09:57,639 --> 00:10:00,141 Carry the 3, add a 2. 241 00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:01,309 I got it. 242 00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:02,977 I fucking got it! 243 00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:05,480 Whoa. I-Is that it... the portal gun? 244 00:10:05,605 --> 00:10:06,314 Yeah. 245 00:10:06,439 --> 00:10:08,942 That's the three lines of math that separates my life as a man 246 00:10:09,067 --> 00:10:10,944 from my life as an unfeeling ghost. 247 00:10:11,069 --> 00:10:12,153 Awesome possum. 248 00:10:13,780 --> 00:10:15,100 Mission control, you getting this? 249 00:10:15,198 --> 00:10:16,449 Holy shit, yes! 250 00:10:16,574 --> 00:10:17,909 Yes! We got it! 251 00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:18,910 - Yeah! All right! - Thanks, Rick. 252 00:10:19,035 --> 00:10:20,930 I'll try to remember to shut off the brainalyzer. 253 00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:23,206 Actually, I think it shuts off automatically 254 00:10:23,331 --> 00:10:24,415 once your brain is liquid. 255 00:10:24,541 --> 00:10:25,750 Don't know, don't care. 256 00:10:25,875 --> 00:10:27,794 Pull me out. 257 00:10:27,919 --> 00:10:29,504 Hey, pull me out. Can you hear me? 258 00:10:29,629 --> 00:10:31,089 Nope, they cannot. 259 00:10:31,214 --> 00:10:32,854 - Why not? - Because the code you uploaded 260 00:10:32,924 --> 00:10:34,551 wasn't actually my portal-gun formula. 261 00:10:34,676 --> 00:10:37,262 It was a virus giving me full control over the brainalyzer. 262 00:10:37,387 --> 00:10:38,989 What are you talking about? This is a memory. 263 00:10:39,013 --> 00:10:40,849 Y-You can't alter details of a memory. 264 00:10:40,974 --> 00:10:43,059 True, but you can alter anything you want 265 00:10:43,184 --> 00:10:45,770 about a totally fabricated origin story. 266 00:10:46,062 --> 00:10:48,273 It's a trap! Abort! I'm still in his shoney's! 267 00:10:48,398 --> 00:10:50,275 Repeat... We never left his shoney's! 268 00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:52,360 Mission accomplished, boys. Pull me out. 269 00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:53,528 Roger that. 270 00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:55,053 Have fun in what's left of my brain. 271 00:10:55,113 --> 00:10:56,215 I'm gonna transfer to yours. 272 00:10:56,239 --> 00:10:58,408 Oh, there's not enough room for all my genius, 273 00:10:58,533 --> 00:11:00,553 so I'm leaving you with my fear of wicker furniture, 274 00:11:00,577 --> 00:11:01,911 my desire to play the trumpet, 275 00:11:02,036 --> 00:11:03,476 my tentative plans to purchase a hat, 276 00:11:03,580 --> 00:11:05,039 and six years of improv workshops. 277 00:11:05,165 --> 00:11:06,791 - Comedy comes in threes. - It's a trap! 278 00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:08,918 Abort! We never left his... 279 00:11:14,841 --> 00:11:16,259 Rick: Another day, another dollar. 280 00:11:16,384 --> 00:11:18,011 Am I a great insect creature or what?! 281 00:11:18,136 --> 00:11:19,220 Congratulations, agent. 282 00:11:19,345 --> 00:11:20,698 You'll be highly commended for this. 283 00:11:20,722 --> 00:11:22,162 Always wait for permission to 284 00:11:22,265 --> 00:11:23,701 Feel accomplishment... That's my motto. 285 00:11:23,725 --> 00:11:25,185 One thing still perplexes me... 286 00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:27,020 Why would Rick Sanchez turn himself in? 287 00:11:27,145 --> 00:11:29,606 Well, I'm just a dumb-ass bug, but it's possible Rick knew 288 00:11:29,731 --> 00:11:31,211 he'd be interrogated at this facility, 289 00:11:31,274 --> 00:11:32,794 where we not only keep our most wanted, 290 00:11:32,901 --> 00:11:34,027 but our most sensitive data. 291 00:11:34,152 --> 00:11:36,196 Anyone here with level-9 access could 292 00:11:36,321 --> 00:11:37,989 I don't know. Collapse the government. 293 00:11:38,114 --> 00:11:39,407 I'm just gonna go take a dump. 294 00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,284 Is it cool if I use the level-9 bathrooms? 295 00:11:41,409 --> 00:11:43,828 W-What's the level-9 master access code again? 296 00:11:43,953 --> 00:11:45,830 Oh, that's easy... 8-3... 297 00:11:45,955 --> 00:11:47,498 Oh, yeah! 298 00:11:47,624 --> 00:11:49,083 S.e.a.I. Team ricks in the house! 299 00:11:51,461 --> 00:11:52,670 Hi, Rick. 300 00:11:52,795 --> 00:11:53,795 Bye, Rick. 301 00:11:58,426 --> 00:11:59,886 D-99, y-you okay? 302 00:12:01,888 --> 00:12:04,515 I'm bummed I didn't get to give that insect dick a test drive. 303 00:12:04,641 --> 00:12:06,368 Wait, wait, wait, wait! T-The council of ricks sent us. 304 00:12:06,392 --> 00:12:07,602 We have your morty and summer. 305 00:12:07,727 --> 00:12:09,062 They're prisoners on the citadel. 306 00:12:09,187 --> 00:12:10,187 Great. 307 00:12:10,271 --> 00:12:12,690 Security breach in room 6755. 308 00:12:12,815 --> 00:12:13,524 Lovely. 309 00:12:13,650 --> 00:12:16,486 Not only is my plan screwed up, I also forgot how to improvise. 310 00:12:16,611 --> 00:12:18,529 All security people approach. 311 00:12:18,655 --> 00:12:20,698 Security breach. 312 00:12:26,913 --> 00:12:28,456 A city of grandpas? 313 00:12:28,581 --> 00:12:29,958 Morty: It's the citadel of ricks. 314 00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:32,186 All the different ricks from all the different realities 315 00:12:32,210 --> 00:12:33,896 got together to hide here from the government. 316 00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:35,630 But if every Rick hates the government, 317 00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:36,881 why would they hate grandpa? 318 00:12:37,006 --> 00:12:38,883 Because ricks hate themselves the most. 319 00:12:39,008 --> 00:12:41,511 And our Rick is the most... Himself. 320 00:12:41,636 --> 00:12:42,679 Not anymore, homey. 321 00:12:42,804 --> 00:12:44,389 S.e.a.I. Team ricks turned his unibrow 322 00:12:44,514 --> 00:12:46,516 into two brows... with a bullet. 323 00:12:47,642 --> 00:12:50,812 Your Rick's dead! Your Rick's dead! 324 00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:56,526 Sir, Rick d-99 is returning from the mission alone. 325 00:12:56,651 --> 00:12:59,153 Apparently, s.E.A.L. Team ricks suffered heavy casualties. 326 00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:00,154 Bring him in. 327 00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:03,491 He says he'll only talk to a Rick with higher clearance. 328 00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:05,535 La-di-da. Give me that. 329 00:13:05,660 --> 00:13:08,997 D-99, this is the commander in chief of the citadel's militia. 330 00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:10,290 Go... Good enough. 331 00:13:12,750 --> 00:13:15,586 He's a spy. Blow him up. I'm gonna go take a shit. 332 00:13:15,712 --> 00:13:17,714 Operating an unregistered portal gun, 333 00:13:17,839 --> 00:13:19,382 radicalizing a summer, 334 00:13:19,507 --> 00:13:21,092 conspiring with a traitorous Rick. 335 00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:22,093 How do you plead? 336 00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:23,553 How is this a fair trial? 337 00:13:23,678 --> 00:13:25,179 O-Our lawyer is a morty! 338 00:13:25,305 --> 00:13:27,545 It's not fair, you have no rights, and he's not a lawyer. 339 00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:29,225 We just keep him here because he's fun. 340 00:13:29,350 --> 00:13:30,476 Look at him go. 341 00:13:30,601 --> 00:13:31,728 Yeah! 342 00:13:31,853 --> 00:13:34,188 We'll be lenient if you renounce your Rick. 343 00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:35,690 What say you, summer? 344 00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:38,609 I say fuck you! My grandpa was my hero. 345 00:13:38,735 --> 00:13:40,462 You killed him because you were jealous of him. 346 00:13:40,486 --> 00:13:42,113 That's pretty obvious from the haircuts. 347 00:13:42,238 --> 00:13:44,407 So do what you want to me, but let my brother go. 348 00:13:44,532 --> 00:13:45,950 He already renounced Rick. 349 00:13:46,075 --> 00:13:46,701 M o rty? 350 00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:48,578 What? 351 00:13:48,703 --> 00:13:51,164 N-No, I don't want to see your pog collection. 352 00:13:51,289 --> 00:13:53,541 I don't renounce Rick, and I never have. 353 00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:56,044 I was just trying to protect my sister. 354 00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:57,712 I wanted you to have a normal life. 355 00:13:57,837 --> 00:13:59,773 That's something you can't have when Rick shows up. 356 00:13:59,797 --> 00:14:02,467 Everything real turns fake. Everything right is wrong. 357 00:14:02,592 --> 00:14:04,987 All you know is that you know nothing and he knows everything. 358 00:14:05,011 --> 00:14:07,972 And, well... well, he's not a villain, summer, 359 00:14:08,097 --> 00:14:09,766 but he shouldn't be your hero. 360 00:14:09,891 --> 00:14:13,102 He's more like a demon or a super fucked-up god. 361 00:14:13,227 --> 00:14:15,229 Let's not suck the ghost of his dick too hard. 362 00:14:15,355 --> 00:14:17,231 He was a terrorist, and now he's dead. 363 00:14:17,357 --> 00:14:19,209 Oh, yeah? If you think my Rick's dead, he's alive! 364 00:14:19,233 --> 00:14:21,193 And if you think you're safe, he's coming for you! 365 00:14:27,158 --> 00:14:28,910 Hey! Whoa, whoa! What are you doing in here? 366 00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:31,329 This area is for teleporting the entire citadel 367 00:14:31,454 --> 00:14:33,915 to somewhere else using only buttons and dials. 368 00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:35,583 Yeah? Well, it's a bad idea 369 00:14:35,708 --> 00:14:38,503 to have it designed that way then, isn't it? 370 00:14:44,592 --> 00:14:45,694 What the fuck? 371 00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:48,096 We just teleported into a galactic federal prison! 372 00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:50,640 I'm gonna go take a shit. 373 00:14:50,765 --> 00:14:52,517 Order in the court! Whoa! What the hell?! 374 00:14:52,642 --> 00:14:53,642 Oh, my god! 375 00:14:55,645 --> 00:14:57,397 Aah! 376 00:14:57,522 --> 00:14:58,940 Wait, wait, wait, wait! No, no, no! 377 00:15:01,984 --> 00:15:03,986 Whoa! 378 00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:05,904 Whoa! 379 00:15:13,287 --> 00:15:17,250 The citadel has been teleported to federation space. 380 00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:19,961 It's doomed. This has to be c-137, you guys. 381 00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:21,522 - What are we gonna do?! - You know he's coming for us. 382 00:15:21,546 --> 00:15:23,673 All right! Calm down! We have his summer as a hostage. 383 00:15:23,798 --> 00:15:24,924 Obviously, I get her. 384 00:15:25,049 --> 00:15:27,343 You guys play Rick, laser, scissors for the morty. 385 00:15:28,886 --> 00:15:30,304 W-What the hell is that? 386 00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:32,390 Payback. 387 00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:35,977 Grandpa Rick! 388 00:15:36,102 --> 00:15:37,728 - Duh. - You're alive! 389 00:15:37,854 --> 00:15:38,938 - Rick! - Morty, take this. 390 00:15:39,063 --> 00:15:41,315 You're gonna need it later. 391 00:15:44,485 --> 00:15:46,195 Hold on. Hold on. Whoa! 392 00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:48,072 Council member: That's enough, Rick. 393 00:15:48,197 --> 00:15:49,877 What... what's this supposed to accomplish? 394 00:15:49,949 --> 00:15:51,075 We have infinite grandkids. 395 00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:53,661 You're trying to use Disney bucks at a Caesars Palace here. 396 00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:56,122 That's a bluff. He's bluffing, sir. He loves me. 397 00:15:56,247 --> 00:15:58,791 You're a rogue Rick... Irrational, passionate. 398 00:15:58,916 --> 00:16:01,544 You love your grandkids. You came to rescue them. 399 00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:03,463 I came to kill you, bro. 400 00:16:03,588 --> 00:16:05,006 That's not even my original summer. 401 00:16:05,131 --> 00:16:06,817 Oh, my god. He's not bluffing. He's not bluffing! 402 00:16:06,841 --> 00:16:08,676 - R-Rick? - Why not shoot through her? 403 00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:10,928 Twenty yards, nine-Gauge plasma pistol. 404 00:16:11,053 --> 00:16:13,473 My first shot would quuify her insides and injure you, 405 00:16:13,598 --> 00:16:14,765 second shot adds recoil. 406 00:16:14,891 --> 00:16:17,211 The risk to me is minimized if I wait for you to shoot her, 407 00:16:17,310 --> 00:16:18,603 which I'm encouraging you to do. 408 00:16:18,728 --> 00:16:20,188 - What the fuck?! - Or let her go, 409 00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:21,913 which I will reward with a quicker death. 410 00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:23,065 Because you love her! 411 00:16:23,191 --> 00:16:26,319 Because it's incentive for you to give me my cleanest shot, 412 00:16:26,444 --> 00:16:28,112 which will be your least painful death. 413 00:16:28,237 --> 00:16:30,740 But if you want to die slower than that, I'm super into it. 414 00:16:30,865 --> 00:16:32,468 All you got to do to get that started is kill the girl. 415 00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:34,785 - I hate you! - Not an issue, sweetie. 416 00:16:34,911 --> 00:16:36,829 That's enough! Drop the gun, Rick! 417 00:16:36,954 --> 00:16:38,674 Morty, I know you're too stupid to get this, 418 00:16:38,706 --> 00:16:40,309 but you're really fucking this up right now. 419 00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:41,876 I'm not letting you let my sister die! 420 00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:42,877 Drop the gun! 421 00:16:43,002 --> 00:16:44,802 I wasn't gonna let her die, you fucking moron! 422 00:16:45,963 --> 00:16:47,715 The point is he thought I was going to. 423 00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:50,510 I totally did, by the way. You're a fucking moron, morty. 424 00:16:50,635 --> 00:16:51,886 Morty, you fucking idiot! 425 00:16:52,011 --> 00:16:53,731 Rick: You're a serious fucking idiot, morty! 426 00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:54,948 You basically killed us all! 427 00:16:54,972 --> 00:16:56,972 - You're the worst! - You're dumb as a bag of sand! 428 00:17:02,688 --> 00:17:04,232 Who's stupid now, bitch?! 429 00:17:04,357 --> 00:17:06,025 Morty! We just got him back! 430 00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:08,611 That was amazing, morty. 431 00:17:08,736 --> 00:17:10,112 Oh, my god. Wow. 432 00:17:10,238 --> 00:17:11,822 Okay. Let's wrap this... 433 00:17:13,199 --> 00:17:14,909 Good job, morty. Let's go, kids. 434 00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:16,285 What?! What happened? 435 00:17:16,410 --> 00:17:17,912 Oldest Rick trick in the book. 436 00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:19,956 "Fake gun. Shoot me in standoff." 437 00:17:20,081 --> 00:17:21,541 - Brilliant! - Ha! Yeah. 438 00:17:21,666 --> 00:17:24,001 G-Good thing I saw that note. 439 00:17:30,383 --> 00:17:31,884 Couldn't we just portal home? 440 00:17:32,009 --> 00:17:33,386 Not until I finish what I started. 441 00:17:34,595 --> 00:17:37,682 And that is how you get level-9 access without a password. 442 00:17:38,766 --> 00:17:39,642 Freeze! 443 00:17:39,767 --> 00:17:41,852 Employee of the month, ladies and gentlemen. 444 00:17:41,978 --> 00:17:44,021 So what are you doing with level-9 access anyways? 445 00:17:44,146 --> 00:17:45,826 Destroying the galactic government. 446 00:17:45,940 --> 00:17:46,941 - Awesome! - Whoa! Cool! 447 00:17:47,066 --> 00:17:49,086 Are you going to set all their nukes to target each other? 448 00:17:49,110 --> 00:17:50,837 Ooh, or... or reprogram their military portals 449 00:17:50,861 --> 00:17:52,422 to disintegrate their entire space fleet? 450 00:17:52,446 --> 00:17:54,365 Good pitches, kids. I'm almost proud. 451 00:17:54,490 --> 00:17:56,659 But watch closely as grandpa topples an empire 452 00:17:56,784 --> 00:17:59,870 by changing a one... to a zero. 453 00:18:03,082 --> 00:18:05,352 Mr. President, the blemflarck's value just dropped to nothing. 454 00:18:05,376 --> 00:18:06,502 What do you mean? 455 00:18:06,627 --> 00:18:08,754 I mean our single centralized galactic currency 456 00:18:08,879 --> 00:18:12,633 just went from being worth one of itself to zero of itself. 457 00:18:12,758 --> 00:18:14,468 - Dear god, no. - Calm down, people. 458 00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:16,634 Deploy the galactic militia and declare martial law. 459 00:18:16,721 --> 00:18:17,597 Yes, sir. 460 00:18:17,722 --> 00:18:19,432 Uh, what should I pay them with? 461 00:18:19,557 --> 00:18:22,518 Their payment is the honor they'll feel to serve their... 462 00:18:22,643 --> 00:18:24,645 Wait. Who's paying me to yell at this guy? 463 00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:27,064 I can answer that... for money. 464 00:18:27,189 --> 00:18:28,667 I never thought I'd live to see this day. 465 00:18:28,691 --> 00:18:29,900 Gentlemen! Gentlemen! 466 00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:32,486 There's a solution here you're not seeing. 467 00:18:35,740 --> 00:18:37,533 - Give me your jacket! - Give me those pants! 468 00:18:45,666 --> 00:18:47,335 I want more jackets! 469 00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:50,004 He who controls the pants controls the galaxy! 470 00:19:04,226 --> 00:19:08,230 No longer will the insects have domain over surface world! 471 00:19:16,364 --> 00:19:18,449 Jerry, what the hell is happening?! 472 00:19:18,574 --> 00:19:20,284 The galactic government cohapsed. 473 00:19:20,409 --> 00:19:21,744 - Are you okay? - Look. 474 00:19:21,869 --> 00:19:23,430 I'm not proud to share this, but the truth is, 475 00:19:23,454 --> 00:19:25,247 I just kept crawling, and it kept working. 476 00:19:25,373 --> 00:19:27,213 Oh, I'm glad you're okay. 477 00:19:27,333 --> 00:19:31,087 Are we ever going to stop paying for indulging your father? 478 00:19:31,212 --> 00:19:33,923 Our children, our planet, our jobs. 479 00:19:34,048 --> 00:19:35,549 Is there anything left to lose? 480 00:19:35,675 --> 00:19:37,885 Just each other, and I'll never let you go. 481 00:19:38,010 --> 00:19:41,013 And I'm so sorry I ever did this to us. 482 00:19:41,597 --> 00:19:43,808 Guess who dismantled the government. 483 00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:45,973 - Please don't leave me again. - I never will, baby. 484 00:19:46,060 --> 00:19:47,820 I was right! He turned himself in on purpose! 485 00:19:47,937 --> 00:19:49,397 It was all part of his plan! 486 00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:50,916 Jerry, is there any light beer left? 487 00:19:50,940 --> 00:19:52,608 It's insane what you miss in prison. 488 00:19:52,733 --> 00:19:54,485 Um, okay. 489 00:19:54,610 --> 00:19:56,570 No, no, no. Foot-down time. 490 00:19:56,696 --> 00:19:58,114 No. You're right. Where's the vodka? 491 00:19:58,239 --> 00:20:00,783 Beth, it's him or me! 492 00:20:04,704 --> 00:20:06,330 Seems like you guys need some privacy. 493 00:20:06,455 --> 00:20:08,457 I'll, uh, I'll be in the garage. 494 00:20:11,502 --> 00:20:14,004 What the fuck?! Not cool, Jerry! 495 00:20:14,130 --> 00:20:16,424 A man's garage is his castle. 496 00:20:23,556 --> 00:20:28,436 Jerry's going to spend some time... divorced. 497 00:20:28,561 --> 00:20:30,396 Oh. Oh, i-I'm sorry to hear that, sweetie. 498 00:20:30,521 --> 00:20:32,106 I hope I had nothing to do with that. 499 00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:34,608 Oh, god. Dad, that is not your burden to bear. 500 00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:37,445 I feel terrible that I misjudged you. 501 00:20:37,570 --> 00:20:39,155 This is gonna be good for Jerry. 502 00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:41,198 - For everybody. - For everybody. 503 00:20:41,323 --> 00:20:44,410 I better tend to Jerry 504 00:20:44,535 --> 00:20:47,079 before he changes his mind and doesn't move out. 505 00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:49,165 I will leave you two to your adventures. 506 00:20:49,290 --> 00:20:50,082 Oh, my god. 507 00:20:50,207 --> 00:20:52,376 Nancy says they're drawing and quartering aliens 508 00:20:52,501 --> 00:20:53,544 in the school courtyard, 509 00:20:53,669 --> 00:20:55,838 and it technically counts as patriotism. 510 00:20:55,963 --> 00:20:58,799 Geez! Are my parents seriously gonna get divorced? 511 00:20:58,924 --> 00:21:00,235 All right, Rick. I'm gonna go to my... gah! 512 00:21:00,259 --> 00:21:01,969 Not so fast, morty. You heard your mom. 513 00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:04,638 We've got adventures to go on, morty, just you and me. 514 00:21:04,764 --> 00:21:06,684 And sometimes your sister and sometimes your mom, 515 00:21:06,807 --> 00:21:07,807 butneveryourdad. 516 00:21:07,850 --> 00:21:09,852 You want to know why, morty? Because he crossed me. 517 00:21:09,977 --> 00:21:11,687 Okay. Take it easy, Rick. T-That's dark. 518 00:21:11,812 --> 00:21:12,980 Oh, it gets darker, morty. 519 00:21:13,105 --> 00:21:15,065 Welcome to the darkest year of our adventures. 520 00:21:15,191 --> 00:21:16,376 First thing that's different... 521 00:21:16,400 --> 00:21:17,627 - No more dad, morty. - Oh, geez. 522 00:21:17,651 --> 00:21:19,171 He threatened to turn me in to the government, 523 00:21:19,195 --> 00:21:20,946 so I made him and the government go away. 524 00:21:21,071 --> 00:21:21,864 Oh, fuck. 525 00:21:21,989 --> 00:21:24,825 I've replaced them both as the de facto patriarch 526 00:21:24,950 --> 00:21:26,660 of your family and your universe. 527 00:21:26,786 --> 00:21:27,929 Your mom wouldn't have accepted me 528 00:21:27,953 --> 00:21:29,473 if I came home without you and your sister, 529 00:21:29,497 --> 00:21:31,297 so now you know the real reason I rescued you. 530 00:21:31,415 --> 00:21:32,775 I just took over the family, morty, 531 00:21:32,833 --> 00:21:34,644 and if you tell your mom or sister I said any of this, 532 00:21:34,668 --> 00:21:36,212 I'll deny it, and they'll take my side 533 00:21:36,337 --> 00:21:37,377 because I'm a hero, morty. 534 00:21:37,421 --> 00:21:39,608 Now you're gonna have to go and do whatever I say, morty, 535 00:21:39,632 --> 00:21:40,341 forever! 536 00:21:40,466 --> 00:21:42,319 And I'll... I'll go out and I'll find some more of that 537 00:21:42,343 --> 00:21:45,095 "mulan" szechuan teriyaki dipping sauce, morty. 538 00:21:45,221 --> 00:21:46,531 - What are you talking about? - Because that's... 539 00:21:46,555 --> 00:21:47,866 That's what this is all about, morty! 540 00:21:47,890 --> 00:21:49,370 - Szechuan? - That's my one-armed man! 541 00:21:49,475 --> 00:21:51,395 I'm not driven by avenging my dead family, morty! 542 00:21:51,435 --> 00:21:52,311 That was fake! 543 00:21:52,436 --> 00:21:54,396 I-I'm driven by finding that mcnugget sauce. 544 00:21:54,522 --> 00:21:56,162 I want that "mulan" mcnugget sauce, morty! 545 00:21:56,273 --> 00:21:57,959 - That's my series arc, morty! - What the hell? 546 00:21:57,983 --> 00:22:00,170 If it takes nine seasons, I want my mcnugget dipping sauce... 547 00:22:00,194 --> 00:22:02,130 - Szechuan sauce, morty. - What are you talking about? 548 00:22:02,154 --> 00:22:03,173 That's what's gonna take us 549 00:22:03,197 --> 00:22:05,217 - all the way to the end, morty. - What are you talking about?! 550 00:22:05,241 --> 00:22:06,367 Nine more seasons, morty. 551 00:22:06,492 --> 00:22:08,911 Nine more seasons until I get that dipping szechuan sauce. 552 00:22:09,036 --> 00:22:10,756 - What is that?! - For 97 more years, morty! 553 00:22:10,788 --> 00:22:11,664 What are you talking about?! 554 00:22:11,789 --> 00:22:13,749 I want that mcnugget sauce, morty! 555 00:22:49,076 --> 00:22:49,952 Isitready? 556 00:22:50,077 --> 00:22:51,745 Yes. We can bring it online now. 557 00:22:51,871 --> 00:22:52,955 Do it. 558 00:22:56,458 --> 00:22:59,295 I am Phoenix person. 559 00:22:59,420 --> 00:23:01,064 Phoenix person? Is that what we settled on? 560 00:23:01,088 --> 00:23:02,965 I thought we all agreed on cyber bird. 561 00:23:03,090 --> 00:23:04,925 Y-You said you didn't care what he was called 562 00:23:05,050 --> 00:23:06,343 as long as we brought him back. 563 00:23:06,468 --> 00:23:07,803 Yeah, but Phoenix person? 564 00:23:07,928 --> 00:23:09,263 Fine. Fuck it. Who cares? 565 00:23:10,639 --> 00:23:14,143 Ka-kaw!